I should have known things were going along much too smoothly to be our actual life. So I wasn’t shocked when I got home and saw this:
alarmed, a little but you know… we are due. After the last two weeks of these:
Which are finally healing up, I come home to find my son covered in eczema and sporting purple/red circles under his eyes. Since he puked up soy formula all day yesterday, I bit the bullet and bought some of this:

And for the first time probably since he was born, he finished a bottle and then did not spit up. Any at all. I mean, yesterday with the soy was reminiscent of newborn puke days, of four-shirt days and mop-puke-off-the-floor-with-your-sock days. That newborn puke has been tapering off, but hasn’t totally disappeared, and yesterday when I switched to soy for the day, holy SHIT I was so grateful. You’re confused? Well let me tell you. I was a little sad about never being pregnant again, and not having a tiny baby to wear in a sling, and newborn cooing and snuggling. And then yesterday happened. And I remember the puke. And I never want to go back there, ever. So thanks, dairy allergy! (Oh sorry, it’s not an ALLERGY since he’s not dying of Anaphylaxis- it’s an INTOLERANCE)
So anyway. Three bottles of liquid gold later, and still no puke. Is this all we had to do? This whole time? We could have just sold a kidney or two and bought up some of this Alimentum stuff and there would have been no puke? Are you fucking kidding me?
This would be funnier if the hypoallergenic formula cost less than THREE TIMES what we pay for organic dairy. And if I hadn’t literally just bought two cases of organic dairy, delivered Monday.











Dude, try to return the organic shit. Or sell it on CL.