I had eloquent words for this post but time and energy have run out. So I’ll just update. I did go to the E.R. – I was given a breathing treatment, rebuked for driving myself there which I admit was reckless and stubborn, and prescribed a short course of steriods.
I was reluctant to use the medication, but the reality is that I am in crisis, and medicine may help me where my floundering around with natural cures may kill me. There’s no holistic clinic to visit here in the Deep South. There’s no acupuncture in the E.R.
So I’ll take the medication, and I’ll pledge to Do Things Differently from now on. I was stubborn and dismissive with my breathing and I knew I was crossing lines. I didn’t prevent this, and I feel like I should have been able to. It may be that this upheaval would have been too much for even a prefectly balanaced system, but I didn’t make any effort to be balanced, and I can’t help but think I’m paying for that now.
The crisis seems to be mostly over. The medication should kick in and relieve the lung inflammation, and the rescue inhalers should prevent another full blown attack. I do my small part by sitting in bed, forcing myself to breathe slow and easy and not to panic when I cough.